Paaie van herinnering

« South African Women’s Closed Chess Championship 2008 Final Results

Paaie van herinnering

13/01/2008 by Nikita

English readers…link to my English poem is at the bottom of this post…and there’s more on “my poetry/gedigte”-page-link on top of my blog.

Paaie van herinnering
Ek wandel op paaie van herinnering
in die laataand van my skemering
seer is die felle herinnering
opgewonde die blye ontmoeting
Ek klop aan die deur van smart
ek het nie vergeet die liefde van my hart
en drink soms die beker van smart
wat soos kanker bly vreet in my hart
Ek steek nie al die kerse aan
die brand — jy sal verstaan
as jy laat in die aand
net een kry wat brand
Net een wat steeds brand
vir ons liefde se stand
wat lank nie is: bestand
teen die wette van vanaand
~~~ ©Nikita

To read my English poem….please click HERE and feel welcome to drop me any comments! The link will open in a new window.

9 Responses

on 13/01/2008 at 05:26 | Reply mykopop

Nou ja, jy het gesê positief of negatief, die feit dat jy dit lankal geskryf het maak dit makliker!

Ek persoonlik hou nie baie van ‘n aaaa rympatroon nie, liewer aabb of abab, maar dis seker persoonlike voorkeur, en dalk wenslik dat ‘n digter verskillende rym deur sy/haar werk gebruik. Dit lyk amper asof dit hier en daar dalk tot rymdwang lei, bv. die tweede laaste lyntjie. Die derde lyntjie van die tweede kwatryn wat weer eindig met die rymwoord ‘smart’, lyk bietjie of dit ingedruk is om die aantal reëls vol te kry. Die ritme is ook nie vir my oral bevredigend nie, bv. “felle herinnering” en “blye ontmoeting” sou ek dalk liewer wou verander na “fel herinnering” en “bly ontmoeting”. Ook die tweede lyn van die tweede kwatryn is nie vir my baie lekker nie – asof daar te veel woorde is.

Die belangrikste is dat die gedig diep gevoelens aanraak, en in daardie opsig slaag dit vir my, en daarom sien ek uit na die volgende keer waarvan jy praat!

Onthou net ek is ‘n amateur, dus wag ek nou dat ander kommentators my kritiek in vlamme neerskiet.
on 13/01/2008 at 11:01 | Reply boerinballingskap

Ek is nie ‘n geoie kritikus nie. Die gedig is mooi…
on 13/01/2008 at 16:49 | Reply Nikita

Hi Kop..ek moet eerlik se.. ek hou deesdae van GEEN rympatroon nie! 🙂 Die rympatrone is amper soms asof dit jou bind en ek voel ek wil nie gebind wees nie. Ek moet eerlik se toe ek die gedig geskryf het, het ek geweet wat ek wou skryf en hoe ek dit wou se, maar daar was op een of twee plekke waar ek gevoel het ek forseer nou ‘n woord in net as gevolg van die rympatroon wat ek begin het…dus…jy is reg… met jou kommentaar! Dankie vir jou kommentaar… !
Ek hou nie daarvan om gedigte te verander, as ek hom geskryf het, moet hy so bly… ek begin en skryf en sal dalk ‘n leesteken verander, maar moet eerlik se ek weet nie of ek vandag daardie gedig so in ‘n vierkantige raampie sou inpas nie… hy is te “geblok”… ek dink jy weet wat ek meen! 🙂

Hi Boer… dankie vir jou kommentaar..! Ek is ook nie ‘n goeie een nie…alles is altyd vir my ook “mooi”.. 🙂
on 14/01/2008 at 09:16 | Reply Skoor

Getroud? Jy lyk te jonk vir daai.
on 14/01/2008 at 13:41 | Reply meghnak

Hey Nikita,
That was a wonderful poem! I liked it very much. I’m glad u brought it before us!

Keep Blogging 😀
on 14/01/2008 at 21:59 | Reply Nikita

Hi Skoor… dankie vir die kompliment! 🙂

Hi Meghna! Thanks for your comments.. glad you enjoyed the English one! 🙂
on 17/01/2008 at 09:20 | Reply Jasper

Nikita,
Jy skryf soos jy voel jong

Positiewe kritiek:
Dit is mooi woorde en ‘n baie mooi tema en geskryf met gevoel. Daar is ook atmosfeer.

Negatiewe kritiek
Grammaties kan jy aan die “arrangement” van die lyne werk om meer ritme te bou. Wees ook versigtig vir herhaling in ‘n gedig soos die.

Rymdwang kán gebruik word tot jou voordeel. (Dit is nie noodwendig taboe nie en is partyker die enigst manier om “atmosfeer” te skep in die gedig). Leipoldt is ‘n goeie voorbeeld.

All in All, glad nie sleg nie. 😉 Ek hou hiervan.
on 17/01/2008 at 22:12 | Reply Nikita

Hi Jasper… dankie vir jou kommentaar ook! elke bietjie help! 😉 ek moet eerlik se, ek hou nie van die herhaling in die gedig nie…dink ek het “daardie tyd” nie van beter geweet nie…maar soos ek vir Kop ook gese het, ek het nie aan hom verander nie, maar sou ek hom vandag moes oorskryf, was daardie herhaling beslis nie in nie, die rymdwang ook nie en dalk glad nie eers rym nie… ek weet nie hoekom nie, vir myself hou ek deesdae nie baie van die idee dat elke reeltjie MOET rym nie… maar wanneer ek ander mense se gedigte lees en die rympatrone kry, dan pla dit my glad nie! 😉
on 18/01/2008 at 00:15 | Reply Gister en vandag… « Chessalee

[…] Jy hoef nie skaam te wees nie…ek kan dit hanteer!! lol! Jy kan “Paaie van herinnering HIER lees! […]

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Chess Grandmaster -Vassily Ivanchuk says:
"And do you like playing chess against women?
I wouldn’t say I do particularly, but I also wouldn’t say I don’t like it. In general, I try not to make an exception out of games against women. In chess, female logic differs little from male logic, which you can see just by analysing games. After all, the strongest female players work with men in one way or another. I don’t know what the female style of play is. Or more precisely, I don’t see any difference when compared to male play. In everyday life I also don’t divide people into men and women. For me, personal qualities, mentality and upbringing are the important things when spending time with people."
Recent Chess Tournaments

Karen Asrian Memorial[click image for the link] Tata Steel Chess - Click the image for the Official site of Tata Steel Chess [previously Corus Chess] London Chess Classic Dortmund 2010 South African Open 2010 British Chess Championships 2010 Nalchik 2010 Fide Women's Grand Prix -25 April to 8 May Thinking is fed from subjective and in unconscious roots and from objective data transmitted through sense perceptions.--Carl Jung 2009 - 2-12th July - Dortmund Live 2009 SA Open 3-11 July in Cape Town MTel 2009 Nalchik Live Games 2009 Corus 2010 Linares 2010 World Youth Chess Championships 2009in Kemer-Antalya - Turkey 11-22 Nov----
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Some Thoughts

Everyone is a genius.But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.
It is hard for an empty bag to stand upright.― Benjamin Franklin
The real challenges on the way to become a master test your strength of character more than they test your chess skill!-Kevin Spraggett
A people are what its women are. The woman is the conscience of her nation as well as the measure of its values. The moral life of a nation is controlled by the women and by the women can we measure the moral condition of the people. - Postma
Descartes: cogito ergo sum (ek dink, daarom is ek)
==The stupid neither forgive nor forget, the naive forgive and forget,the wise forgive but do not forget--Thomas Szasz
Wanneer jy groot dinge dink, groot dinge glo en groot dinge bid, gebeur groot dinge - N V Peale
Mense sonder boeke, is soos arende sonder vlerke-G.D.Labuschagne

A mere copier of nature can never produce anything great. -Joshua Reynolds
~~~
Jou beeld is 'n verflenterde foto in 'n skewe, versplinterde raam en 'n sestal geskommelde letters spel jou tweelettergrepige naam Jou woorde is dor manuskripte vir die motte bewaar op die rak en ons dae 'n kralesnoer syfers op 'n outydse muuralmanak. - Koos du Plessis
Love means nothing in tennis, but it's everything in life.
Einstein:Chess grips its exponent, shackling the mind and brain so that the inner freedom and independence of even the strongest character cannot remain unaffected.

Die woord 'skaak' kom van die Persiese woord 'sjah', wat koning beteken. Ook die woord 'mat' is Persies en beteken 'dood'.
~~~
2010!
If chess is a science, it's a most inexact one. If chess is an art, it's too exacting to be seen as one. If chess is a sport, it's too esoteric. If chess is a game, it's too demanding to be just a game. If chess is a mistress, she's a demanding one. If chess is a passion, it's a rewarding one.
If chess is life, it's a sad one-Unknown
Anand vs Topalov 21 April 2010
Book of the moment: In Search of South Africa by H V Morton

http://rpc.technorati.com/rpc/ping

Don't Quit
by: Unknown Author

When things go wrong as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh.
When care is pressing you down a bit.
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.
Life is queer with its twists and turns
As every one of us sometimes learns.
And many a failure turns about
When he might have won had he stuck it out:
Don't give up though the pace seems slow -
You may succeed with another blow.
Success is failure turned inside out -
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt.
And you never can tell how close you are.
It may be near when it seems so far:
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

"Vrome vaa'dre,fier en groot!
Deur vervolging, ramp en nood
was hul leuse, tot die dood:
Vrijheid, Vrijheid!
Op dan broers, en druk hul spoor,
voorwaarts, broers, die Vierkleur voor
laat die veld ons krijgsroep hoor:
Vrijheid, Vrijheid!"
Jan FE Celliers

'He who knows not and knows not he knows not, is a fool, shun him. He who knows not and knows he knows not, is simple, teach him. He who knows and knows not that he knows, is asleep, wake him. He who knows and knows that he knows, is a leader/wise - follow him.' -